Pain Into Purpose, Part 1: The Moment You Choose Yourself
There’s a moment in every woman’s life when she realizes she can’t keep living the same way. A moment where survival mode no longer works. A moment where pretending to be okay becomes too heavy. A moment where she finally whispers to herself, “Something has to change.”
That moment is the beginning of healing.
For years, I carried pain that wasn’t meant for me. I held on to hurt because I didn’t know what life looked like without it. I stayed in environments that drained me, conversations that dimmed me, and relationships that didn’t honor who I was becoming. I poured into people who wouldn’t lift a finger for me. I tolerated things that went against my spirit. And I kept choosing pain—not because I wanted it, but because healing felt unfamiliar.
But pain has a way of pushing you into purpose when you’re ready.
And the first step… is choosing you.
Choosing Yourself Isn’t selfish — It’s sacred.
When I finally chose myself, everything changed.
I stopped explaining why I was quiet.
I stopped shrinking to make others comfortable.
I stopped involving myself in chaos.
I stopped entertaining distractions that weren’t aligned with my future.
Instead, I allowed God to shape me in silence.
I allowed wisdom to guide me.
I allowed peace to become my new normal.
People said I “changed” — but what they really meant was,
I stopped performing for a version of me they benefited from.
Growth will always confuse people who are committed to the older version of you.
Sitting in Pain vs. Choosing Purpose
This series exists because I learned a powerful truth:
You can sit in your pain and let it destroy you,
or you can face your pain and let it transform you.
Sitting in pain leads to:
emotional chaos
self-doubt
repeating old cycles
reacting instead of responding
keeping the same life you’re trying to escape
But choosing purpose leads to:
clarity
peace
self-respect
alignment
spiritual maturity
becoming the woman God intended
Turning pain into purpose doesn’t mean ignoring what happened.
It means not allowing it to define you anymore.
What Choosing Yourself Looked Like for Me
My healing started quietly:
I became more observant.
I learned to control my reactions.
I removed myself from draining conversations.
I stopped trying to prove myself to anyone.
I protected my peace like it was sacred—because it is.
I started spending more time alone, listening to God’s voice.
Little by little, my life began to shift.
And I began to feel whole for the first time.
When you start choosing yourself, you will see who was truly benefiting from your brokenness.
Your Invitation: Choose Yourself Today
I want you to ask yourself:
What is one area of my life where I’m still choosing pain?
Is it a relationship?
A friendship?
A habit?
A mindset?
A version of you that no longer exists?
Now ask:
What does choosing myself look like today?
Not next month.
Not when life feels easier.
Today.
Because your healing starts the moment you decide you deserve more than the pain you’ve been carrying.
You Deserve Peace. You Deserve Wholeness. You Deserve You.
This is only the beginning of the Pain Into Purpose series.
In the posts ahead, we’ll dive deeper into:
✨ Setting boundaries without guilt
✨ Healing your inner child
✨ Releasing people who only knew the unhealed you
✨ Finding spiritual alignment
✨ Becoming the woman of your dreams
✨ Learning to love yourself after hurt
Your journey toward purpose has already begun — because you showed up today.
And I’m proud of you.
